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Sometimes I fantasize about a world where I'm in charge, chocolate makes you skinny, and everything is always 75% off.

Funny Confession Ecard: I feel fat today. And to make myself feel better, I will eat this cake. Yes. Good plan.

This is very true, and also once in a while take us somewhere we can wear pretty dresses and cute shoes.

I'm right 98% of the time. The other 3% is when I have to solve math problems.

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Funny Cry for Help Ecard: Actually I'm pretty sure chocolate tastes as good as skinny feels.

I loved that episode of SpongeBob. He tries to show his squirrel friend that he can survive sunlight, but he dries out so bad...

This makes me mad because people don't realize it resembles spoink a bit (who is in fact a pokemon)

"Why can't I be comforted by carrots? Why does it have to be chocolate and wine?" and OULA dance fitness ha ha

this brings back memories of calculus class..