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I am going to stand outside. So, if anyone asks, I am outstanding.

Liar, liar, pants on fire!

I'm always disappointed when a liar's pants don't catch on fire.

Behind every beautiful woman, there's a guy who's tired of fucking her. | Breakup Ecard

Free and Funny Breakup Ecard: You Play The Victim So Well. I'm Surprised You Don't Carry Around Your Own Body Chalk.

Aunty Acid

How can we respectfully and compassionately help women approaching or over 50 who are struggling with life transitions?

Or puts a dish in the sink and calls it doing the dishes

That is if he will take the trash out at all! My husband does a ton of other things, but trash isn't one of them! I have learned to pick my battles!

present tense, health, querer gordos el otro lunes

What are we? What do we want? To start our diet and exercise! When do we want to start? On Monday! Today is Monday. Next Monday! :D

10 Awesome E-Cards for Parents - Idealist Mom

10 Funny E-Cards Only Parents Will Understand

Free and Funny Family Ecard: No matter what life throws at us, at least we don't have ugly children.

Point well made! #funny - I remember my grandad telling me about this quote. He had a very quick wit himself.

"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink" Lady Astor. "Madam, if you were my wife, i would drink it". Winston Churchill (a gentle man).

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