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Kill them with kindness... And then fart as you walk away. I just peed myself laughing

There is a land called Douche Bagastan, and you are their king. | Thinking Of You Ecard | someecards.com

HAHAHA!!! This brings back memories of when my brother and I found out that Velma says that and laughed so hard. Then I wrote a Scooby-Doo fanfiction on a text to speech app... it was fun.

Not to mention names.....but we all know...

Yes, and cookies, brownies and anything else covered, smothered, dipped, dunked, infused, injected, topped, candied or baked with chocolate!

Nothing can keep someone with determination down.

These shopping gimmicks always kill me. I love how they say " open a new credit card and get 15% off today's purchase when you know the interest rate is going to be 22%.... Every month!! No thanks!!

Oh honey, you're not pretty enough to be that stupid.

Mister Owl, How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ah one, Ah two-ho, Ah three... Ah-three. (remember now?)