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I did all of the above, which makes me feel weirdly human

I did all of the above, which makes me feel weirdly human

"I am your father's, brother's, nephew's, cousin's, former roommate's, cat."

"I am your father's, brother's, nephew's, cousin's, former roommate's, cat."

Instead of replying to her rude comments, I highlighted all her grammatical and spelling errors and sent back a note saying, 'Bitch, I can't read this, try again.'

Instead of replying to her rude comments, I highlighted all her grammatical and spelling errors and sent back a note saying, 'Bitch, I can't read this, try again.'

"You don't really know someone until you get ridiculously drunk w/ them."

"You don't really know someone until you get ridiculously drunk w/ them."

Don't make me mad then tell me to calm down. That's like shooting someone then telling them to not bleed.  #someecards

Don't make me mad then tell me to calm down. That's like shooting someone then telling them to not bleed. #someecards

I'm having one of those days that skipping coffee and going straight to booze seems completely acceptable.  Happy Monday!

I'm having one of those days that skipping coffee and going straight to booze seems completely acceptable. Happy Monday!

This is the one lesson i dont want you to teach me. dont take him away :(

This is the one lesson i dont want you to teach me. dont take him away :(

Funny Wedding Ecard: Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown man child who cant take care of himself.

Funny Wedding Ecard: Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown man child who cant take care of himself.

I love him... and by love I mean 51% of the time I don't want to punch him in the throat. | Confession Ecard | someecards.com

I love him... and by love I mean 51% of the time I don't want to punch him in the throat. | Confession Ecard | someecards.com

What I love most about our friendship is that it's based soley on innapropriate conversations that no sane person should have. Ever.

What I love most about our friendship is that it's based soley on innapropriate conversations that no sane person should have. Ever.

I've got some serious sassy pants on today.  WATCH OUT! I feel bad for all of my coworkers.  #Sorry

I've got some serious sassy pants on today. WATCH OUT! I feel bad for all of my coworkers. #Sorry