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I wish I could trade my heart in for another liver. Then I could drink more and care less. | Friendship Ecard

Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes.

Okay, even though I am well on my way to getting rid of my extra weight, I thought this was funny

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This SO applies to one of my co-workers, however, we'd need to add Monday-Thursday as well. Just saying...