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It's Elaine! (A Platinum Girls reference. If you don't know PG, go here and learn of the goodness: www.palacetheatre...)

How I react to babies....I put my hands up and back away so I won't have to hold it lol

"You say you'll be here between noon and five?" ... "Great, I'll be sure to pay mybill sometime between May and July!!" - This is how it should work.

No actual harm. Just uncomfortable misery. Does that make me a bad person? Never mind. I don't care.

I often walk a fine line between "super fun" mom and "kinda psychotic, maybe we should call the authorities" mom.

Not with Nerium!!! I'm excited to wake up everyday & go to work! #twojobs #success www.hduhon.nerium...

Thanks Pinterest :) ... Click here to tell us what you think of #Pinterest & enter to #Win! ♥

How I feel when people try to talk about shows or movies, if they haven't read the books first.

It starts out funny but then, when you really start thinking about it, it's terrifying. Seriously. I'm out there in the dating world. All my first dates happen in VERY public places and I take pepper spray with me, fucking pepper spray, why is that necessary? Oh right because I don't dare trust that the man I'm going out with has been taught that sexual assault is wrong.

The Shirk Report – Volume 231 «TwistedSifter