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I just ran my first marathon this morning. Just kidding. I'm on my third cupcake.

Just kidding I'm on my cupcake. Just kidding I hate cupcakes. Just kidding I live for cupcakes. Just kidding I live for veggies. Just kidding veggies make me sick. Just kidding millennials make me sick.

I've decided to add "extensive experience in dealing with stupid people" to my resume. That has got to be a marketable skill!! | Confession Ecard | someecards.com

Funny Confession Ecard: I've decided to add 'extensive experience in dealing with stupid people' to my resume. That has got to be a marketable skill!

Image from http://cdn.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/MjAxMy00ZmE5OTA3ZjNmYjAxM2Yy.png.

This is me every single morning. I turn into a teenager trying to come up with good excuses not to get out of bed. (There are days where I totally agree with the caption this lady left!

Apps on iPhone

Whenever I delete an app on my iPhone, the shaking icons make me feel that they're panicked over who's getting cut from the team. --I will never look at that the same

This is the best thing I have ever read.

"Once you lick the frosting off a cupcake it becomes a muffin.and muffins are healthy. You're welcome :)" I KNEW IT! Cupcakes are healthy!

someecards

Funny Confession Ecard: After exercising I always eat a pizza. just kidding. I don't exercise. You love pizza and BakerStone loves you.

Baahahahaha!

Can I just get a bunch of these made up and hand them out like business cards?

Some people are way too caught up in trying to make their life look amazing, instead of fixing the broken parts.

Just calling to remind you that I know you in real life-haha.I know some people like this :)

Back fat: Can't suck it in. Sorry!

This is exactly how I feel about fictional characters. Especially characters like Christian Grey, Gideon Cross, Gabriel Emerson, etc.

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