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"A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house." Although mine usually does clean the house too:)

Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill and not doing it because you'd miss them!

Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill & not doing it because you'd miss them! -- so us haha

I pretend to like people everyday. It's called being an adult and THAT is why we are allowed to buy alcohol. | Cry For Help Ecard

so me.lol "I pretend to like people everyday. It's called being an adult and THAT is why we are allowed to buy alcohol." Some eCards

(funny,funny stuff,lol,lolsotrue,true story,so true,i can relate,bitch)

yep i know alot of people who think they are just being sarcastic but are really just a bitch lol

Your ridiculous photos and overly happy statuses aren't fooling anyone!  And you know who you are!

Just calling to remind you that I know you in real life. Remind you of someone?

Everything Paleo!

I'd do anything to lose except eat healthy and work out. ( I work out so mine is just eat healthy.

But seriously....come on...if someone farts while I'm eating..I'm naturally done eating...let alone watching a bird shit on my car..then decide it's payback...it's a bird...not a chicken...wait a damn second.....!!!!

But seriously....come on...if someone farts while I'm eating..I'm naturally done eating...let alone watching a bird shit on my car..then decide it's payback...it's a bird...not a chicken...wait a damn second.....!!!!

I don't have the energy to pretend I like you today.  -@Ashley Walters Miller

I don't have the energy to pretend I like you today. I dint have that energy most days. ok all days.

I don't understand how some women have 20 plus bridesmaids. I don't even like that many people. | Wedding Ecard | someecards.com

and I am sure the bride with 20 bridesmaids doesn't have 20 real girlfriends

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