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True story...not jealous just don't like you.

I think its funny when people say/post things like hater this, hater that, fuck all my haters. Bitch, no one is jealous of you, you're actually just a huge douche and no one cares.

Just remember, you can't fix stupid.

It's hard to be a positive person when I'm surrounded by dumb motherfuckers.

Funny Confession Ecard: You were so cute until you mentioned you like Barack Obama.

Smartass

"If you're going to be a smart ass, first you have to be smart. Otherwise you're just an ass.

I could keep this kitchen clean if you people would just stop eating here. True story.

I could keep this kitchen clean if you people would just stop eating here. HAYS CLEANING an all purpose cleaning company,

Stop trying so hard to be classy. It isn't working.

Funny Pictures has the most excellent sense of humor. Explore this collection of funny pictures, quotes, and other ha-ha-ha's from around the web.

The fact that you didn't defriend me after my last status makes me wonder if you have me hidden from your news feed.

Funny Courtesy Hello Ecard: The fact that you didn't defriend me after my last status makes me wonder if you have me hidden from your news feed.

funny-ecards-218.jpg 600×420 pixels

Children are not property (meme)

That's why you save my pins and upload them yourself : )

or if I itemize, x million unemployed, x million prisoners, x million crackheads, x million illegal immigrants, and 535 more in the U.S. House & Senate.

I wonder if I can claim the Federal Government as a dependent on this year's taxes?

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