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    My favorite color is 10mg Xanax.

    (I don't agree, because you can be a woman without kids, but this made me laugh...a LOT)

    Hahahahaha truth



    That moment when you decide to punch your husband in the face While he's sleeping cause you'd rather Hear him bitch then listen to him snore.


    Now you try it!


    The trouble with trouble is, it starts out as fun.


    ahahahaha Xanax

    A perfect description of my job.

    Thank God you wished your toddler a happy birthday on Facebook. He never would've seen that tweet.

    bwahahahaha. ive had times like these. thanks friends!!!

    I say this all the time lol

    can't stop laughing at this one

    Funny Birthday Ecard: I say that you're never too old for a theme Birthday Party. This year, I want Magic Mike. Or how about magic michelle? Lol

    agreed... The truth

    Ben's Garden 'I'm Afraid My Train of Thought' Glass Tray

    awww i found someone who loves me for the horrific, raging, emotionally unpredictable bitch that I am :) i love him for him cause he loves me for me