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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, if you do find one, what's your plan?

Oh yes.

A Robber Assist! "If robbers ever broke into my house & searched for money, I'd just laugh & search with them.

haha, so true.

Happens ALL THE TIME. Especially the mirror, zombie, and shower ones. Not to mention all the other ones! And I thought I was the only one!

oh yeah

Yup, I do this, haha but can never hold it enough. so I guess I'll drown in that movie

I hate this...  Lol

People who hold the door open for you when you're still 20 yards away, forcing you into an awkward jog of gratitude. Hate this shit

Google: I know everything.Facebook: I know everyone. Internet: Without me, you're all nothing.Electricity: Keep talking fools.

Are you listening Luke Bryan, Chris Hemsworth, Channing Tatum, Chace Crawford and zac Effron? Nope I want Tom Hiddleston :) ;

58546863875519636_ARBFOUlh_f.jpg 300×300 pixels

I'm the type of girl that will burst out laughing at something that happened yesterday. So me i will laugh at something that happened two years ago.

This sucks when you're doing rainbow road, you realize you've just been repeatedly falling off the edge and are now so far behind everyone else that there is no chance of winning. let alone getting out of last place. True Story.

This has happened to me when the kids had me play Mario Cart with them. Needless to say, I'm not invited to play Mario Cart anymore.

I swear Walmart does this on purpose cuz they're mad "People of Walmart" has been taken as a negative

Dear automatic flushing toilet, I appreciate the enthusiasm, but I wasn't done yet.

It's supposed to taste like cherry, but it tastes more like yuck.

"No, Grape cough medicine, you don't taste like grape. You taste like death and the tears of small children. Not grape.

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