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You flipped the bitch switch, so sit down, buckle up, and enjoy the ride, asshole. Sorry, but this really made me laugh

You flipped the bitch switch, so sit down, buckle up, and enjoy the ride, asshole. Sorry, but this really made me laugh

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.

You're like the first slice of bread in the bag. Everyone touches you, but no one really wants you.

You're like the first slice of bread in the bag. Everyone touches you, but no one really wants you.

If I wanted to kill myself, I’d climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ level.

If I wanted to kill myself, I’d climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ level.

Sometimes I think these are written for people I unfortunately know. Bahaha

Sometimes I think these are written for people I unfortunately know. Bahaha

Ha ha for emotional stuff, unfortunately this is very true. Leelee is one of the only people who can give me on the dot advice. Most others I just appreciate their trying to help and in my mind am saddened because they don't understand what I'm upset about.

Ha ha for emotional stuff, unfortunately this is very true. Leelee is one of the only people who can give me on the dot advice. Most others I just appreciate their trying to help and in my mind am saddened because they don't understand what I'm upset about.

Funny Wedding Ecard: Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown man child who cant take care of himself.

Funny Wedding Ecard: Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown man child who cant take care of himself.

haha for real!! i'm always sitting in my car going "oh no dont worry, i wasnt on my way somewhere before i saw you crossing the street"

haha for real!! i'm always sitting in my car going "oh no dont worry, i wasnt on my way somewhere before i saw you crossing the street"

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