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Stupid me! So that's why I work so many hours, so you can collect welfare, wear pajamas in public and have an iPhone. | Workplace Ecard | someecards.com

Stupid me! So that's why I work so many hours, so you can collect welfare, wear pajamas in public and have an iPhone.

Stupid me! So that's why I work so many hours, so you can collect welfare, wear pajamas in public and have an iPhone. | Workplace Ecard | someecards.com

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

When I'm old(er) ... I'm not going to sit around knitting ... I'm going to  .... http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/73/e1/50/73e1507052dc0485ffefa78e5c08d1b4.jpg

When I'm old(er) ... I'm not going to sit around knitting ... I'm going to .... http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/73/e1/50/73e1507052dc0485ffefa78e5c08d1b4.jpg

Yeah, and boys who wear nike/puma socks with their nike/puma sandals with basketball shorts, this includes you. It's not cute.

Yeah, and boys who wear nike/puma socks with their nike/puma sandals with basketball shorts, this includes you. It's not cute.

I'm not calling you a 'slut'. I am calling you a 'penny'-because you are two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants.

I'm not calling you a 'slut'. I am calling you a 'penny'-because you are two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants.

Re-electing Obama is like backing the Titanic up and hitting the iceberg a second time.

Re-electing Obama is like backing the Titanic up and hitting the iceberg a second time.

Kinda tired of having a "job" and having to "go to work" and "pay bills." Now accepting applications for a sugar daddy.

Kinda tired of having a "job" and having to "go to work" and "pay bills." Now accepting applications for a sugar daddy.

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Funny Confession Ecard: Curling irons have a warning tag that says For external use only. Which one of you sick people made that necessary?

When Mommy finally gets up to spank your butt, that's when you know... Shit just got real.

When Mommy finally gets up to spank your butt, that's when you know... Shit just got real.

..

Or. how about "helping your Uncle, Jack, off OF a horse" (improper use of capitalization for emphasis only). See, actual proper grammar and punctuation saves the day! But not as funny.