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I do so many things well, none of which generate income.

Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.

➤ See the best Facebook fan page for Pinterest Humor! #ecards #someecards #rottenecards www.facebook.com/...

That moment when you're checking on your sleeping baby and their eyes open so you run before you make direct eye contact.

I haven't been able to get my kids to pay attention to anything I've said all day. So, I'm gonna sit here and pretend I'm on the phone. That should do it.

I didn't know why my child had a middle name until he entered toddlerhood...

I forgot to say goodbye! I'll never see them again! *sobs* ....... *continues pinning and forgets why I was sobbing*

'Should I add more liquor?' is the most ridiculous question I've ever been asked.

I like to surround myself with people who share in my inappropriate comments, sarcasm and random shenanigans.

Funny Family Ecard: 9 times out of 10 children get their awesomeness from their mother.

Legos. In just about every room of the house.