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Well its a pity your mother din't teach you how to treat a woman. Fortunately for me, mine taught me how to treat a douchebag.

Funny Breakup Ecard: Well its a pity your mother din't teach you how to treat a woman. Fortunately for me, mine taught me how to treat a douchebag.

Funny Flirting Ecard: I am literate, I like beer, I have dogs and a valid driver's license. Plus, I'm really good at parallel parking. I'm kind of a catch.

"I am literate, I like beer, I have dogs and a valid driver's license. I'm kind of a catch." Well I have a cat but I like dogs too!

I don't have an attitude problem.  You have a problem with my attitude and that's not my problem! #haha ummmmm..... Guilty!

BUT Ask yourself, "Do I have an attitude problem?" If you do have an attitude "problem". How others react to your attitude (good or bad) IS their "problem" or rather their priviledge to choose :)

Don't have the energy maybe some other time

Arguments with housemates have literally condemned me to my room for the foreseeable future through fear of running into them and having to repeat the same argument another 50 billion times.

I work well with others when they leave me the fuck alone.

Funny Workplace Ecard: I work well with others when they leave me the fuck alone. Yep that's about sums it up.

I don't understand how some women have 20 plus bridesmaids. I don't even like that many people. | Wedding Ecard | someecards.com

this is the most accurate thing ever. I don't get the whole bridesmaid thing, period. They get people they hardly ever talk to so it looks like they actually have friends.

I've decided to add 'extensive experience in dealing with stupid people' to my resume. That has got to be a marketable skill!!

Funny Confession Ecard: I've decided to add 'extensive experience in dealing with stupid people' to my resume. That has got to be a marketable skill!

HAHAHAH would love to say this to many people. Ecard

Funny Friendship Ecard: You must get tired of putting makeup on two faces every morning. *oh, SNAP!

Just FYI - I am out of the medicine that makes me like you...

Funny Confession Ecard: Just FYI - I am out of the medicine that makes me like you.

Funny Breakup Ecard: I just saw her picture on facebook, she looks like something I draw with my left hand.

This might be my favorite insult ever. Except my friend might not laugh. she's left handed and draws pretty darn well.

I'm not an astronomer, but i'm pretty sure that the earth revolves around the sun and not you.

Sometimes people just need to hear it. Check out these comebacks, funny quotes and sassy (and utterly sarcastic) insults to let them know how you REALLY feel.

Let's not make this more complicated than it has to be. If you don't want to be called out on your shit, don't act shitty.

Free and Funny Reminders Ecard: Let's not make this more complicated than it has to be. If you don't want to be called out on your shit, don't act shitty.

HAAA HAAAA

Funny Ecard: I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people.I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.