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Would somone please just call Carley Rae Jepson so she will stop singing about it!

I know so many ppl like this!

when I was a baby, an evil fairy cursed with me expensive taste and no money. Champagne taste with a beer budget!

" 'Nobody puts baby in the corner.' Unless baby is fall down drunk and can't find her purse, shoes, or integrity. In that case, the corner is good."

Funny movies humor: "Nobody puts baby in the corner. Unless baby is fall down drunk and can't find her purse, shoes, or integrity. In that case, the corner is good.

hahaha...this pick up line would freakin work on me cause I'd laugh so hard

Funny Flirting Ecard: On a scale from one to America, how free are you tonight?

Yup that's me

This is me and it always gets me in trouble. Why can't I keep my mouth shut. Does it really matter that everyone else is thinking it?

Oh but it is attractive

Funny Confession Ecard: All I want is a man who looks like Ryan Reynolds, dances like Channing Tatum, never ages like Edward Cullen and makes me laugh

I try not to worry about the future- so I take each day just one anxiety attack at a time

I try not to worry about the future- so I take each day just one anxiety attack at a time. Pretty much perfect.

When I was a kid I wanted to be older... This shit was not what I expected.

Funny Cry for Help Ecard: When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This shit was not what I expected.

Free, Workplace Ecard: For those of you that want to make a deposit into your Checkins account, those do not exist, there is a Checking account and a Savings account.

If I have more than 3 days off work, I forget how to do my job. But if a song comes on the radio that I haven't heard since I still know every. If it's more than a week, I forget passwords, co-workers names, etc.

Funny Stuff: Mommy’s On The Phone

It's more like "Mom is on the phone, lets play 20 questions, and ask her if I can do all the things she said no about 2 minutes ago." said ALL of my children.

Funny Valentine's Day Ecard: If I worked in a restaurant... on Valentine's Day I would put a fake engagement ring in every girl`s drink.

I know one desperate freak that would go psycho when she realized it was a joke tho! Funny Valentine's Day Ecard: If I worked in a restaurant. on Valentine's Day I would put a fake engagement ring in every girl`s drink.

Haha!  www.LiquorList.com  "The Marketplace for Adults with Taste" @LiquorListcom   #LiquorList

This totally happens at my house. Beer and veggies are in the same drawer. But the veggies usually go bad before they get consumed. Can't say the same for the beer.

I thought you knew!

I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

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