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Be afraid. Be very afraid.

I'm afraid of a world run by adults who were never spanked as kids and got trophies just for participating. The Wussification of America. So true and so funny.

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vacation from your mouth-why the silent treatment is really an award

Yep.

Funny Flirting Ecard: If you're talking behind my back. you're in a real good position to kiss my ass.

She eats meat, butter, chocolate and desserts.... all washed down with copious amounts of wine

Butter + meat + dessert + wine = healthy 51 year old lady. Who says math isn't fun :)

But people love me anyway.....

So me. My family says "the guy on my shoulder" is drunk haha

Well....maybe the fourth lol

Just kidding I'm on my cupcake. Just kidding I hate cupcakes. Just kidding I live for cupcakes. Just kidding I live for veggies. Just kidding veggies make me sick. Just kidding millennials make me sick.

me for the past 3 days lol...i need to go see the fam asap!

Well, aren't we just 2 scoops of grumpy in a bowl full of bitch this morning?

Why cant we be friends?  Well, because youre three gallons of crazy in a two gallon bucket and I dont have time for a mess like you. #funny crap

Why cant we be friends? Well, because youre three gallons of crazy in a two gallon bucket and I dont have time for a mess like you.

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