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I ended my bitchy text message with a smiley face... She can't get mad.

So help me -- I am one ignored text away from posting that close-up double chin picutre of you.

I actually stay home with a few toddlers... so you know I struggle with adult conversations. :P

You're always ahead of schedule when it comes to disappointing me.

haha i feel more like a canadian dime. theyre special and rare (bc im a smart blonde) but they wont buy you much.

HA! Everytime!!! (But i'm glad to know that others do this, too!)

I swear, I'm not anti-social, I just have a very low tolerance for idiots.

Funny Confession Ecard: Sometimes I don't answer your calls because I'm too tired to give you advice that your not going to take.

I hate when people say "He's a nice person once you get to know him." They might as well just say "He's a douche, but you'll get used to it."

I don't always pin, but when I do I pin 5,000 things in one sitting! LOL - so true!

This is what happens. I'm not even kidding. Jack Frost picks me up and puts me back in bed. Though he's hotter in real life....

Lol. Smartest man ever. At museums he is allowed to touch the art. His mother has a tattoo that reads Son. Both sides of his pillow are cool.