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I love Ellen and her show, and nearly every one of these tweets made me laugh.

For real though. << HAHAHHAAAA..aaaaaa...a wait. I'm actually Squidward..... SPONGEBOB SAVE ME

I'm never ready to do things at 8am, unless I absolutely must

Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Gotta print this for my diary when I go back to work.

This applies to cars that ride my bumper too! I'm already going over the speed limit, you aren't making me go any faster!

"Hahaha vs Bahaha. Omigosh I'm laughing so hard right now. XD I say bahaha all the time. Apparently I'm viewed as a demented sheep. Still laughing. Can't stop." another pinner said. When I see "Bahahahhaha" i imagine an old man laughing LOL :) this cracked me up :)

I swear........if I see one more "alot" in a post, I may say or do things that may not make me proud later. IT IS TWO WORDS, PEOPLE!

Your pity party on Facebook should have been created under events so we could have chosen to attend or not;).

I think my boyfriend knows that look from me and that statement ALL too well. "no honey, i'm not mad at you... i'm mad at what you've done and said... so yes, indirectly, i'm very mad at you." lol but i love him and wouldn't trade it for the world :)

Being a complete bitch all day takes so much effort. Why aren't you more exhausted?

haha yes ... welcome to every hike i've ever been on!