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that. is. funny!!! now I want a damn turtle too! and not just because i can make it where diapers. which, by the way, is pretty brilliant when you come to think about it!

Print off a few pages of one liners by Mitch Hedberg, and pull them out whenever you need a laugh. Works for me every time.

I feel like there should be a warning stamped on sulcata tortoises that says "yeah i'm cute but i grow up to be 3 feet in length and weigh anywhere from 100-200 pounds"

I am going to make one of these and put it on a wall at work, see how long it takes everyone to notice :0)

Hi EMERY! Lol I was just gonna say hey and I needed a pic so I found this one and thought....hey why not lol

Brilliantly Sarcastic Responses To Completely Well-Meaning Signs | Happy Place

The Diving Turtle is a symbol of creation from the North American Indians, and is part of the inspiration for the Daliesque Earth Diver, original art-jewellery. Silver pendant & chain necklace with 23kt gold vermeil diving helmet and enamel. #GiftAStory

Actually it was a bunch of college guys who were writing a paper and they were like "lets come up with the stupedest thing we can come up with" and this Teenage Mutan Ninja Turtles was born! True story.

What happened bandaids. Bought colorful ones at the dollar store and write on them in permanent marker when kids get hurt. :)