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Hilarious as a speech path!! Especially since I always say I could move to Boston so I wouldn't have to work on /r/!

I once went to a professional headhunter. They did a personality assessment on me, and the first thing the guy said to me when he saw my results was "You have no patience for stupid people."

I would do this...I am always leaving stuff on the back burner which gets hot if the oven is on. I left the diaper bag, milk, etc...i generally catch it before its too bad though haha.

This is physically painful to read. ...No, seriously, I have an acute pain in my head after reading this.

Sometimes I fear for the human race.

Lucy and Ricky. So good.

I just laughed out loud for a good 2 minutes solid. Then I looked at it again and cracked up again.

The past, the present, and the future walked into a bar. It was tense. :)

Surprisingly mine is the other way around. I get pushed off..