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Haha that rude man needs someone to show him what's it like to win an award and have it ruined by an a-hole.

Even if I should never, in my most desperate hour, ever try to actually be a stripper.

I am just tucking them under the other clothes, not hiding them. Not really... I mean you never want your underwear out in sight, even they aren't on. Right?!

'I need to talk to you' is the one sentence that has the power to make you remember every bad thing you'veever done in your

Funny Confession Ecard: She thinks she's hot shit on a silver platter but she's just a cold turd on a paper plate.

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I should really start going to bed earlier so I have more time in the morning to be late for work.

The Inner Monologue of a Pinner: 'I want to sew!' 'No, I want to workout.' 'Wait, is that a mason jar?' 'Oh f*ck it, now I want cake.'

Hahahaha..seriously though i pin WAAAYYYYY too much onto my wedding board when i am no where near getting married anytime soon

Before you marry him, listen to him chew; if you can stand that noise the rest of your life, go ahead with the wedding. Trust me on this one.

The one about the candle salad is hilarious because my grandma used to have me help her make those for family dinners when I was little.