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Love this joke! 14 years ago a guy came up to me at a party and said"What's fun about THAT (holding up a fun sized mars bar) to me a fun sized mars bar would be THIS BIG!!"(gestures full arm length)  I thought he had a witty sense of humour so I married him!

"Fun sized" is a lie. Less chocolate =less fun. BOOM and the truth is out!

Serving my drinks in these tiny glasses is only creating more work for you. Now go and fetch me something more bucket-ish

Sunday morning all you can drink Mamosas. Just bring a pitcher. Seriously, I promise we are going to drink way more than one glass.

For all the taxes they take out of my paycheck, the least they could do is send me a picture of the ghetto family I'm supporting to hang on my fridge!

Frieda is a character in the comic strip Peanuts by Charles Schulz.

"People Always Expect More of You When You Have Naturally Curly Hair", Peanuts, December I got my curls from my mother. Blessed now , but cursed them for many years

As evidenced by the 10 year old walking around with his dad in target today with his unedited rap music at full volume in his pocket.

Free and Funny Graduation Ecard: I believe basic common sense should be taught in schools since it obviously isn't being taught at home any longer.

Lucy, you're not alone. Peanuts - Charles M. Schultz

I think every week should have a day where boys give presents to girls Lucy Charlie brown

Funny Confession Ecard: Raisin oatmeal cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason I have trust issues.

Anyone who knows me well, knows I pick the raisins out of my oatmeal raisin cookie and the the oatmeal cookie! mmmm, chocolate chip oatmeal cookies are yummm-o though :)

Yes, yes it is!

Pacifically this one drives me crazy! My EX said that all the time and it drove me crazy.

Hahaha!! Yup!

LolSoTrue: # 344 when i text you a whole paragraph and you text me back 40 minutes later saying 'K'. Are you asking to be punched?

awkward moment

I feel like this when I go to Target for one specific thing and they don't have it. I feel like every cashier is looking at me wondering if I am feeling ok or if I had some kind of head injury.

I could keep this kitchen clean if you people would just stop eating here. True story.

"I could keep this kitchen clean if you people would just stop eating here." - YOUR ECARDS - funny

One time I was so jealous all my friends got the new crayola markers with the black on the outside like in 2nd grade

Markers weren't out yet, but I do remember the aroma when I opened my new box of 48 Crayola crayons!

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