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It is a true fact.

Beer before liquor, never sicker. Toothpaste before orange juice, dead. Haha thus the reason I rarely drink orange juice I about died!

Jokes humor funny

funny quote based on how i react when toast pops out, i will never look cool walking away from an explosion. so me

6th grade

Oh, thank god! But the sad thing is, when I get older I will probably still say thank god I don't look like I did at

If I had a dollar for every time @Jamie Dektas and I started a story like this...

This is so true. And I love that this is totally how most of my friends' stories start!


raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason I have trust issues.or raisin cheesecake.or raisin cannoli.

I definitely thought that was true when I was a little kid!

My brother told me aliens and monsters lived under the bed.then the next morning I stuck my led off and hit the dog's leg and thought it was a monster's leg.from then on i would crawl to the end of the bed and take a flying leap out of my room :D


I know some ppl like this. Lemme catch one of them trying to roast marshmallows on my fire. I'll give them a BIG HUG so we can roast together.

I don't like thinking of this in the daylight either!

or other scary things that come out in the dark. Like burglars. Or murderers, or clowns. Or spiders, or ghosts.

Relatable Post it's impossible to slowly tip toe around without activating your T-rex arms


I hate brushing my teeth at night because that signifies that you can't have anymore food and I'm just never ready for that kind of commitment. THIS IS MY LIFE

Once you proactively DECIDE that you're going to start working out on a consistent basis, the next logical question is WHEN?  There is so...

yep, i should keep a pad and pen next to my bed so i can remember it in the morning

 OMG! THIS IS SO ME! If I was pulled ver and asked to say the alphabet backwards I would have to say hold on let me sing the song first so I know all of them forward first.

i'm pretty happy with my life choices but i do both of these things lol.

Haha and you cant remember how to spell it correctly so your just sitting there like such a fail xD

That moment when you spell a word so wrong that even auto correct is like, "I've got nothing man" story of my life