sarcasm

…well, to be fair, I guess it’s more like “If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, don’t ask a question.” Look, sarcasm is my default.

yup

Pretty much every day of my life. School and wedding planning need to be over.

I'm pretty sure I need this!

The Original Turn Off Your Straightener ® Decorative Door Mat, Doormat, Area Rug // Hand Painted Funny Doormat 20x34 by Be There in Five

But mine should say curling iron. And the oven! Turn Off Your Straightener Door Mat / Area Rug Funny Door Mat, Clever Door Mat

Seriously

And by nap I mean a small coma so I can hide from my life some days Yes this is my life. I should just made sad ecards lol

Everyone needs a smart-assed, sarcastic friend. I'm so happy to be of service to you.

Funny Friendship Ecard: Everyone needs a smart-assed, sarcastic friend. I'm so happy to be of service to you.

Haha!! True!

Dear Lord, Thank you for my sick sense of humor and sarcasam. I feel bad every time I laugh. Sort of. (At least it's an honest prayer)

.

True- oh wait I do but it's not high paying! All I really want is a high paying job that lets me wear yoga pants and hoodies to work & only makes me work 4 days a week.

True.

Mostly because I wanted to be a mermaid.<<< i wanted to be a panda that lived in an invisible house on MARS>>> I wanted to be a mermaid who was also a fairy qnd had magical powers AND A PET UNICORN!

Brain before going to sleep: "Let's think about every mistake you've ever made, shall we?" - Imgur

Brain before going to sleep: "Let's think about every mistake you've ever made, shall we?"

Funny pictures about Why I Don't Go To Bed Early Anymore. Oh, and cool pics about Why I Don't Go To Bed Early Anymore. Also, Why I Don't Go To Bed Early Anymore photos.

Ha! Love it

I work hard at my job, but if the opportunity to become a rich housewife arises I'm taking it. ~ thought so too now I kinda miss the grind.

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