This is exactly what happened. I was there, I cared. He was there, he cared. Not contacting you means that we simply are tired of the narcasistic lies. Children and siblings grow up, move out and start their own lives. That is life. Accept it and stop punishing him for your inability to grow up.
Say what you need to say and never be afraid. And there will be times that no matter how gently you say something that is tough, it won't matter. People choose what they want to hear. People who truly know you and are real get it.